Why is it such a far fetched idea that we could possibly be happy just being ourselves? Why do people have to constantly compare every physical, mental, social, emotional aspect of ourselves and our lives to each other? And why do we place such importance on what the media consider to be normal? Who cares! Stop comparing! We are not each other, we are unique amazing individuals and we shouldn’t even be trying to be like someone else’s so called “normal.” Being the best version of ourselves should be our ultimate goal not being “normal” – there is no such thing!
Don’t judge a fish on it’s ability to climb a tree!
I saw a great quote recently by Einstein – a truly wise and intelligent individual – and it said “Everyone is a genius but if we judge a fish on it’s ability to climb a tree, it will live it’s life thinking that it is stupid.” So true! Break the cycle and don’t put your children through such an unrealistic, hopeless and negative endeavour. You should want them to be themselves, they are precious and special they are not everyone else and they should not be expected to be. Outdated school systems with their harmful and unnecessary grading method only serve to perpetuate this myth that we are all supposed to achieve the same things at the same time and if we don’t we are a failure. How does a ‘d’ grade say anything to a child other than you are not good enough, you didn’t keep up with the crowd? They are not sheep, they are children. When we persist in grading a child against all others in their class, we are telling that child that their worth is measured only in terms of how successful they are in comparison to their peers. Instead we should be doing all we can to develop each child’s confidence not annihilate it! They all have their own brilliant unique talents – nurture this!
Give them a break!
Children are not only being compared to each other at school either – some parents do it too! The ones that are meant to be building them up are knocking them down. For some bizarre and totally insane reason that I do not understand, people are comparing when their children first sat up, crawled, walked, talked, potty trained, counted, read and so on and so on. All it does is keep this cycle of comparison going and going. I’ll let you in on a little secret – Children do not all develop the same skills at the same age – Give them a break! All this talk just instils fear and an inferiority complex in yourself, it is unproductive and totally unnecessary. It places way too much pressure on your child and sets you and your child up for a lifetime of failure because you will always be trying to live up to others expectations.
Your Child is Unique!
So why start with this topic? If we are going to talk about nurturing your child’s unique amazing spirit then we have to get rid of all those perceptions that your child should be anything other than themselves. To do this you may have to look introspectively at yourself and let go of all you have learnt before now. Welcome to Darling Precious Children!